WHY is this HAPPENING to ME???!!

Recently, a lot of people I know have been going through extremely tough times. While at the doctor, I heard that the Nurse Practitioner I have had for 5 years (and is about to give birth to her first baby) found out her baby girl has FIVE critical heart defects and likely won't live. A dear friend of mine suffered a molar pregnancy, which is when something goes wrong with the cells during early DNA replication and the "baby" turns into a monstrous growth that can quickly turn into cancer. A friend of a friend just lost their twin pregnancy in the 2nd Trimester when her water broke (and this is now her second miscarriage). All of these different scenarios are with women who are God-fearing Christian couples.

Common responses to this are: "WHY is this happening to them? They are such an amazing couple. I can't believe it is happening to THEM!"

In 2008, when I lost my mom (and began my journey WITH Christ) I asked screamed out these same questions, "GOD WHY IS THIS HAPPENING NOW!? PLEASE DON'T TAKE MY MOM! IT'S NOT FAIR!"

The doctor who treated my friend for her molar pregnancy told her, "I don't know why this is happening to you. You're a young, healthy lovely, married couple and it seems like crackheads can pop out healthy children daily."

"IT'S NOT FAIR!!! WHY GOD??" WE SCREAM! A lot of people waver or completely lose their faith in times like these. They, like me, can't see why a fair God would do this to his beloved, saved children.

But here's the thing, readers. I have news for you. This is the SAME God who told his Son to die on the cross. His only son. As a parent, I can't imagine the heartache at knowing your child has to suffer in this way! To be persecuted for crimes he did not commit. To suffocate for hours. To have nails driven through his hands. To lose his life so that he could save YOU!

Through this, God tells us that our suffering has purpose! That is good news to me.

In a recent sermon, our Associate Pastor preached on Matthew 5:45. Although the sermon was not focused on what I'm talking about today, that verse really struck a chord with me, given these recent sufferings.

"That you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous."

Wow! How powerful! God says here that he shines the sun and the rain equally on all people. All of us experience loss, pain, and suffering equally in our lives. The crackhead who had a healthy baby struggles with addiction and poverty. She's never known the love of a parent or family member to support her. That baby may become her turning point, where she can get support to get clean. Or, maybe it won't and the baby will be adopted by a family who has been waiting on her for 15 years. Only God knows.

This comfort of knowing that my suffering is rooted in some purpose, that I suffer no less or no more than any human being helps me get through these times. God really is fair, although not in the way we wish!

You may be asking why suffering even exists! Why do we HAVE to suffer at all? The short answer is "The Fall of Adam and Eve." I'll go more into that another day.

I just want you to know that telling God that your circumstances are not fair and asking "why" is normal, human behavior. Jesus who was both God and man even said on the eve of his persecution, "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done."  Jesus asked God, in this passage, to take away his suffering, but ultimately realized that God had a greater purpose and he would fulfill that purpose through his suffering.

So powerful! It is not easy to do this, but remember that in the very next passage God sent an angel to strengthen Jesus! Amazing! In your struggles, God will do the same. It may be a friend, or a spouse or even a whackadoodle a very random blog to give you that strength to get through those rainstorms, and feel the SUN (SON) shining on you!

Guard your GOLD!

I heard a story recently about a contractor (who shall remain nameless unless you bribe me with copius Diet Coke use Chinese Water Torture to get it out) who is being sued by a person who hired them to do a lot of expensive work. Apparently, the contractor did not complete the job properly within a reasonable amount of time and as a result, their house now has a lot of water damage.

Now, my disclaimer to this story is: I don't know a lot of the details personally. It is all heresy, so I'm not going to go into much detail on the story. But, what I will tell you is that the contractor is a known Christian. So, despite whatever right or wrong the client did to the Contractor, it is imperative the Christian Contractor go above and beyond, which apparently did not happen.

Before I became a Christian, I had no idea what a Christian testimony or "witness" even is. People are always sharing their "testimony" about how great an iPhone is or how awesome Toyotas are. My husband's 4Runner is about to hit 200,000 miles and has barely needed a BIT of maintenance. My Ford on the other hand...ugh. Crazy people like me are even touting how phenomenal the use of cloth diapers is.

Anyway, when we listen to people's testimony about phones or trucks or cloth diapers we usually gauge the product they're selling with a few short things. First thing, who are they? If it is your friend or parent you're more likely to listen to their assessment of the product. If they're a car salesperson, you probably take what they have to say with a grain of salt. Unless they are your friend AND a car salesperson. I'll let YOU be the judge on that one!

Second, you probably gauge what they're saying with your own experiences, both about the product and with the person. Can you trust what they're saying? Does what they're saying line up with what you're experiences with that product or a similar one agree? If you don't trust them, there is probably good reason. Maybe they're a compulsive liar  car salesperson  only interested in sounding like a good, knowledgeable person, but don't know squat about what they're touting?

Anyway, when it comes to making decisions about products we buy, we often do a lot of research and make a decision based on those factors. (One of the big things we are basing our household decisions on right now is: Where is it made?)  Becoming a Christian is SOOO much more complex, especially for those who haven't been raised in a church. There is no label on people to read that says: "Doesn't Lie. Speaks God's Truth".

I just committed myself to the Lord in 2008 after my mom passed away. Prior to that time, I had gone to church periodically for Easter and Christmas like SIXTY-TWO percent of Americans!!! (This is really crazy, no wonder our "world" is so "worldly".) Anyhow, I "sort of" believed in God, but I had a lot of questions.

The Bible? How could this thing be written "by man" and be all true?

Evolution? How could my school teach me that things evolved over millions of years and the Bible says the Earth was created in a week?

Jesus? How did God make some girl pregnant without sex? It's pretty hard to believe she was a virgin.

Where is this God and why is this HAPPENING to ME!???

If I had parents who were Christians, I could have gotten answers to these questions the first time they appeared. However, my dad is a somewhat aloof Computer Programmer who got "burned" by a church he grew up in and my mom was a Research Toxicologist with a lot of scientific background that did NOT support the Bible. It's no wonder it is hard to believe in God when the world keeps on pushing ideas of evolution and "Ask not what you can do for God, but what God can do for you" attitudes. I will go into the answers to those questions I had more in detail later, but I want to get to that Testimony thing.

When it comes to your Christian Testimony, you must guard it like the gold in Fort Knox. (That place is not in Tennessee, despite a lot of people thinking Knoxville=Fort Knox.) Let's assume that there is even any gold left in that place. It is the one thing we might be able to barter with should China come knocking on our door asking for repayment of our HUMONGOUS debt to them.

With Christianity, your Testimony is like that bartering gold, to unbelievers. So what is a Testimony?

Your Christian Testimony or "witness" is threefold. It is a story that you tell about how you came to Christ, a story about how coming to Christ has changed you, and how God can help someone else change their life. When I say that you need to guard your Testimony, it is because we Christians keep touting that God has CHANGED us!!! The problem is, that becoming a Christian doesn't take away your sin. It only makes you aware of it and you have a DESIRE to change because you now know your sin is wrong.

So, that little problem of not taking away your sin is a big one. If you go to share your Christian Testimony with someone, it is really hard to believe that whole thing that "belief in God can change you", if they don't see a changed person. REAL true salvation causes a change in your heart. You want to please God and so you seek, in all of your behaviors, to praise and worship and proclaim God the King of your life.

Back to the story of the contractor, it is impossible to tell whether the contractor is indeed a Christian or not. That is business between that person and God alone. However, the dispute that was not resolved before a lawsuit is a major hurdle now between that contractor and their Testimony. People are prone to saying, "Christians just SAY they're changed, but when it comes to money, they aren't any more truthful or honest than the next guy."

Christians, you don't have to be perfect. You will make mistakes. But, if you seek by prayer the best way to resolve things with others and God, you will keep your Testimony safe. "The love of money is the root of all kinds of evil." 1 Timothy 6:10  No matter what wrong someone does against you, you HAVE to do what is right (to keep your Testimony safe), whether that is fixing something you don't believe was your fault, or paying more money than you thought you should, or merely being timely with something (which I'm soooo guilty of).

Guard that Testimony like the precious gold it is and you'll be able to share it with all you can without worry they won't find you a trustworthy and sincere source of knowledge of God's Salvation.

Readers, I would love to hear your Testimony. So if you have time, write me about yours. :) I will share my own Testimony sometime soon!

P.S. For you newly saved, guarding your Testimony becomes a lot easier the longer you are a Christian and the better relationship you have with Christ. So, keep on trucking and don't get discouraged if you fall. I have, many times already this week. ;)

It's Friday!!!

Woot! It is Friday, and that means a couple of things.

Number 1: I am done with our Taxes!!! Woohoo! Since we own our own business, our taxes are not "easy-peasy", and I dread them because we usually have to pay in self-employment taxes for things like Medicare and all that down the road. Well, I should not have dreaded them that long. I forgot about something we had this past year. A little thing we nicknamed our sweet, little tax deduction! The Baby! This is the first year in a decade we've gotten anything back. We really shouldn't have waited this long to do them! Ha!

Number 2: Tonight is Date Night!

Number 3: The Baby is done teething. All week, he's been trying to break through his second tooth on the bottom. It has been incredibly like hell  sleep depriving and hard. This coming week, I'm hoping to get back on my regular schedule and sleep routine and thus get some blog posts written.

Number 4: This is the most important, and I need your help with this one. Yesterday, as I was taking laundry out of the dryer, I noticed a Bouty Paper Towel still intact, that looked almost brand new. Conversation that followed:

Me: Husband, I found a paper towel in the dryer that made it through the wash and dry cycle in one piece. It looks almost brand-new. Those things really do hold up!

Captain: Well, maybe we should start washing and reusing them.

Me: Hmm... good idea.

Captain: Why do we even USE paper towels? I mean, we use CLOTH diapers!!!

Me: Very true... I will look for a solution to that.

So, RT Blog Readers, I need some ideas. I love the easy usage of paper towels, how you can just rip one off and have it be fresh and clean. I hate having damp towels hanging around. I have NO storage and not much money. I thought of maybe a way to have fresh clean towels on a roll like the paper towels? Any ideas?

Don't worry.. we're not going to replace our toilet paper either (at least not yet muhahaha) with  Family Cloth yet. :)

Thank you dear readers for your help in this! Your ideas for my hair were AWESOME! I hope to be back to posting more Random Thoughts this next week!

Laundry epiphany: save your sanity!

After "only" 30 years on planet Earth, I have finally figured out how to make laundry enjoyable tolerable. That way is to pay someone else, and preferably not someone in your own household, to do it. Just kidding. I don't have that kind of money. But I really did discover the secret to laundry.

When I was about 8 years old, the laundry fairy stopped coming to my house. Actually, my mom stopped being my slave decided that I should learn to do my own laundry. Man, do I miss those good 'ole days. Anyway, thinking back on that time, I can distinctly remember her telling me something along the lines of, "I'm sick of doing your laundry. You never turn your clothes right-side-out."

I didn't really think too much of it, and went about my way going into our very scary basement to use the washer and dryer. That basement was insanely terrifying for an 8 year old! You had to walk down unfinished wood steps and about 40 feet in the dark to get to the laundry room. There, you would search around for the light switch. Your only source of light was the faint bare bulb coming from the stairwell and the scary glow of the pilot light from the gas furnace. Couple the noises from the furnace with the noise and smell of the sump pit, and you have a world class horror film setting, at least for an 8 year old.

So, the prospect of laundry always involved bringing a partner, which considerably upped the entertainment value. Often, I can remember bringing my 3 year old sister down to the basement with me. The fact that we had a laundry chute in our house also considerably upped the fun factor.

We tried throwing every item not bolted down that would fit in the chute, down it. Things were lowered down it with ropes, thrown up it to try and catch, gravity experiments were done with heavy and light objects, but thankfully I never tried to actually put my 3 year old sister down it! Although, I'm pretty sure we tried to stack enough soft objects in it that you could stand in it on the second floor.

As I got older, I just became used to doing my laundry. As a teen, I would wear things as often as I could to avoid doing laundry. As a college student, laundry again became fun in the communal dorm laundry. Then I reached a point where I was sick of laundry again when it became painful for my back.

For awhile, people helped me do laundry before and after I had back surgery. That was a blessing but also a difficult thing to accept given that I was young and experiencing debilitating pain.

Now, I just plain hate laundry. I had an epiphany this week though. I don't actually hate everything about doing laundry. I don't mind sorting, nor washing, nor transferring laundry to the dryer or clothes rack. I really don't mind doing The Baby's laundry or diapers either. So what exactly do I hate???

ANSWER (for the daily double): HANGING and FOLDING

But whyyyyyyy do I hate those???

Because it seems so tedious and my back starts really hurting after a few minutes of standing in one spot.

But whyyyyyyy does it seem so tedious to do this???

Because it seems to take roughly eleventy-hundred years.

But whyyyyyyy does it seem to take roughly eleventy-hundred years???

Because my mom was freakin right: I never turn my clothes right-side-out.

Ughhhhhh... If I just would have listened to my mom TWENTY-two years ago, I would have saved myself a lot of time and hatred of laundry (and a lot of money rewashing clothes AND turning the dryer on for the fifth time just because I don't feel like putting those suckers on hangers.)

Today I tried turning everything right-side-out before putting things in the washer. Taking the clothes out and hanging them up seemed like a heaven-sent miracle. It took hardly any time and the pain didn't have time to develop.

Next step: relearning 3O years of a bad habit of taking my clothes off wrong.

For you mommas out there, I strongly recommend teaching your kids this step, at all costs; For your sanity and theirs (or their future wife's)!

And in heaven I can just see may mom up there saying, "LMHO!" That's text-type for "Laughing my halo off!"

Cosleeping, a little like staying up all night drinking, but without the fun.

I have had a lack of inspiration in the past couple of days to write blog posts, do laundry, clean my house, or anything else requiring actual work. It is being sucked out of me.. literally.. by a little 5 month old baby. Who now has teeth  one tooth and one about to come in.

I used to swear up and down that there would never be a child sleeping in my bed, unless there was the scariest thunderstorm imaginable or really bad nightmares involved. And then, I had a child, one that I intended to nurse. It all started so innocently...

We had a bassinet that we found at a garage sale. The lady who sold it to me said it was practically brand new because her sister made the mistake of putting the baby in the bed with her. I scoffed. Pshhh.. that won't happen to us. And then, I had a child.

I read a lot of scary statistics about SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) and it all pointed to scary things like bulky bedding, smoking parents, and (gasp) Cosleeping. So, I said that baby would definitely sleep in the bassinet, with no extra blankets, just a SwaddleMe thing and no toys. And then, I had a child.

When we brought said child home from the hospital, he seemed to want to be nursed to sleep a lot. So, being the completely idiotic the new parent I was who was suffering from a complete lack of sleep (and judgement) I would nurse The Baby to sleep and then carefully move him to his bassinet. There he would stay for 2 hours and then wake up screaming, demanding to eat.

After the first few nights of this rigmarole, I began to fall asleep while waiting for HIM to fall asleep. It wasn't working. So, what did I do? I consulted my expert friends, online community, and trusted com padre: Google. Just kidding. I just gave in. I let the baby sleep in the bed with me after the first round in his bassinet from then on out.

What should I have done? Actually consult friends to learn that I needed to be putting him down drowsy so he could figure out how to go to sleep on his own. What did I do? Sentence myself to a lifetime near future of him needing to suckle to sleep and wanting to be beside us to be nice and cozy ALL. NIGHT. LONG.

Unfortunately, I tried sleep training. That worked until darling Husband decided he missed The Baby too much when he was in his crib. I then made the mistake of learning that actually, cosleeping is not any more dangerous than crib sleeping (and can be less dangerous) due to one golden factor: A nursing mother is "in tune" with her baby's movements and breathing all night. Translation? You NEVER fall asleep enough to forget you have a baby sleeping beside you.

<sigh> So, here we are, 5 months in and the little darling is teething now. This is pretty much the closest thing I've ever seen to "demonic possession". What happened to my sweet, happy baby that would only wake up once or twice a night? He was replaced with an angry, pained, mean baby who NEEDS a lot of cuddling and suckling to ease his pain. And I give in.. because I love him.. and I hate that he's going through this.

So, with shamefacedness, I admit our little cosleeping secret. If I haven't scared you away from it yet, I'm going to give you my formula for determining how much sleep you will get if you cosleep:

Take the number of hours that you want to sleep and subtract that number by the number of times you get up at night to go to the bathroom, etc. Now take that answer and divide it by the number of human bodies sleeping in the bed and you have your answer to how many hours of sleep you will get.

Using that formula I get 2.3 hours of sleep a night. That sounds just about right.. no wonder I often need a 5 hour "nap" during the day. It's like a hangover.. that never gets better. But, oh how I love my little guy, so it continues!

A Fly on the Wall

On our Friday night "Date Night", the Husband and I went to dinner at Cracker Barrel. It was a pretty good departure from our normal Friday night excursion to the Outback. For those of you who don't know, Friday is "FISH FRY" day at Cracker Barrel. So, the excitement of getting to watch a whole different type of people was fun. We saw three Catholic priests dressed in full garb, plenty of young families with many kids, and a lot of older couples still enjoying their date night after decades.

Now here comes my secret confession: I like to make up back stories on people that I see in public and Husband likes to name them. He will something like, "Oh, there is Suzy." I will say, "Oh, yeah, she's been married to her husband for 50 years this coming July. They have 5 kids and FIFTEEN grandchildren. They're a little worried that their youngest is on their 10th child though. They stopped remembering the names of the new ones 5 years ago." Generally, the stories are nothing bad or insulting. Just a little fodder to keep us occupied while we're waiting for our steaks (or in this case delicious chicken fried chicken and fish!). But, this one family had me really troubled.

Picture a lady, who is around 40 years old and she is talking on her phone the whole time after her meal is ordered. Her son is about 14 and he is playing a game while waiting for his meal. The youngest is a 10 year old girl who is staring out the window the whole time. It was very obvious that there was a disconnect between them.

I hoped that things would change once this family's food arrived, but it didn't. The mother got off the phone, but she continued to check something online and text in responses. While doing that, she and her son argued over something.

A story began to develop in my mind about them. I pictured a dad who was either not living with them or gone a lot on business. I pictured the mom working a lot and the kids being frustrated over their parents not always letting them do what they wanted. I pictured a family that would go their separate ways most of the time when they got home. TV on. Computers on. Texting. Arguing over the computer use.

It was a sad picture that I had painted in my mind of this family. And I think, unfortunately, it is one that is way too common in the United States. There must be a lot of families that don't even spend enough time together to even know what the others are struggling with. Looking at this family, I could not imagine sitting at the table with my mom and either one of us sitting on the phone. I would give anything for a ten minute conversation with her, now. Even when she was alive, I rarely took for granted our time together.

The Husband and I long ago instituted a "No TV or phone calls during dinner Rule" which has now been expanded to "No TV at all". We have only so much precious time together as lives get busier and schedules get busier. I hope that these rules will help protect our family as our child(ren) get(s) older.

I don't look down on people (or think I'm superior) because we choose to try and protect our family in this way. But, I really hope that maybe this post will make others think, "What would my back story be?" Would you be the family that looks like they talk with each other and enjoy it?

After pondering all of this, I went back to "checking out" the young looking priests. Jesus said that some are born eunuchs, some are made eunuchs, and some choose to be eunuchs. While priests are not exactly castrated, they do choose to live celibate lives. I could not even begin to imagine their back-stories!

Losing my Mind... err... Hair.

If you know me in person, you know that I currently have really long, dark hair. However, I'm afraid that is not going to last much longer. Don't be alarmed, I don't have cancer and am not undergoing chemo. I don't have alopecia and I don't have a hormonal imbalance. I have PTSD: Post-natal Tendril Shredding Disorder.

It isn't bad enough that you lose a lot of your luscious locks after you deliver. Due to hormones, you're no longer keeping as many hairs in your head and you lose hair after birth in fistfuls. THEN, you develop a baby with grip strength that could rival a chimpanzee. That is interested in your mane. And seeks to touch it. And pulls it. A lot. All the time. And it hurts. And brings me back to when I was a kid and my sister pulled my hair. ALL the time.

So, I'm now going bald at an alarming rate. At least that is what it looks like given the copious strands found daily in my son's hands. Today, I thought to myself, I MUST find a solution to this.

First, I thought that maybe I could just cut my hair. The baby doesn't seem as interested in the Husband's hair, although to me it looks like a lot of fun given its curliness! I've had pretty much every hairstyle you could think of. Long locks, the Dorothy Hamill, the Richard Marx (home perms gone BAD), even the "bowl" shaved underneath all the sides, the Rachel, the Pixie, etc. etc. My hair has been literally almost every color there is (even blue, green, and purple). I am just not that attached to the color or style.

But, I am intent on growing my hair out long to donate it to  Locks of Love while I still have my "natural" color. The hair pieces made go only to children under 21 so I think it is a great thing.You can't donate it if your hair is processed or dyed (Edit: I'm wrong. You can donate if it has been dyed, just not any bleaching or highlights!). So, the option to cut is out. I'm starting to get grays and I want to do this donation thing at least once.

Next, I thought, "Well, when does he pull my hair the most?" The answer is usually when we are laying down or sitting nursing. (See my post on this if you've forgotten how "great" nursing is.) (Side note: males may want to skip that post. hehe.) No matter how much I try to distract The Baby with toys, he is FASCINATED by my hair. Also, just pulling it back in a ponytail never works well enough.

So I thought, well... maybe a covering? And so of course I Googled it, and I found these options:

I thought that maybe this hat (on etsy) would be a good option because it would cover most of my head and it would have long, stringy things for The Baby to play with. However, there are a couple of downsides to this.
1.) It would look a little funny if I wanted to use it in public.
2.) Not sure it would fit all of my hair inside, even in the adult version.

But then I found THIS on google. YES! A baby wombat in a hat. Now, THAT would sure occupy him and keep him away from my tendrils. But, there are a couple of downsides to this too.
1.) This might distract him too much and keep him from actually nursing.
2.) I don't know how to care for baby wombats and they grow into adult wombats that perhaps do their OWN hair pulling, thus defeating the purpose of having the baby wombat.

So, I went back to searching for hats and I found THIS on Headcovers Unlimited. This site is a great resource if you are suffering from any kind of hair loss, by the way. Now this is nearly perfect. It would cover ALL of my hair. ALL of my hair would fit in it. AND there is a bunch of little fleece "pull toys" at the bottom! But, there is one drawback.

It is about to be summer. Which means, there is NO way I can wear this out in public and not be mistaken for having a serious illness (physical or mental). Also, due to the crazy, fluctuating hormones I am constantly hot, which is kind of a nice break from my normal, always freezing self. I never once wore a real coat this winter, except while skiing.




So, my next thoughts were, "Well, how can I prevent The Baby from getting to my hair?" So, I thought about taping up his hands  putting some kind of coverings on his hands to keep him from being able to grab it. The downside to that is, perhaps he won't ever develop his fine motor skills. What if I keep him from learning how to grab tiny objects like strands of hair??? Imagine my horror when they tell me in Kindergarten, "Sorry, Mrs. D, we're going to have to hold back The Baby again because he cannot color in the lines."

Here I am, back to square one. I need your collective wisdom!!! How can I prevent this PTSD!??? My husband and hair will thank you!

Sashay, Shauntay.. to the Polls!

Yesterday, the dear Husband and I headed to the polls to exercise our right to vote. Here's a conversation we had on the way there:

Me: I'm not really sure who the best person to win the Republican primary is. There's no way I can vote for Mitt Romney because he's a Mormon and he only believes a certain number of people get into heaven. Wouldn't he be more concerned with getting himself into heaven than the well-being of the American people?

Captain: Yeah, I wouldn't vote for him either. This whole thing is about money and power anyway.

Me: Yeah, I really like the ideas the Ron Paul has, for example only taking $39,000 salary.

Captain: Wait, who?

Me: Ron Paul, that old guy who is running for President. I like his ideas and the fact that he's trying to get rid of debt.

Captain: Wait, WHO are you talking about? Who is this Ron Paul? You mean the transvestite???

Me: (silent pause for a long time) Wait, what?? What transvestite???

(It took me a minute to figure out who he's referring to.)

Me: You mean RUPAUL!!!???????? The transvestite from the 90's!!???

So, in case you're not sure who either of us was talking about, I made a meme so that YOU too can tell the difference:

In the end, I think the Husband decided he didn't know enough about the platforms of the Republican nominees to pick one and just left it undecided. Have I mentioned we don't watch TV in our house? (Side note: I really need to do a post about that whole not watching TV thing to refer to when things like this come up.)

Anyhow, it is no wonder the Captain had no idea about any of the candidates since we don't watch TV and he thinks all politicians are a bunch of crooks. He spends his time getting inspiration for his artwork, and that suits ME just fine. Also, the Republican field is completely muddled, but this sure gives an important lesson in why anything but the 2 party system would be chaos.

The only reason why I have any understanding of all this is because I soak up information like a SPONGE. Nay, I CRAVE information. So, when I scan facebook, twitter, and the news everyday, it all just goes in whether I want it to or not.

The Husband and I were more interested in who would take the local elections anyhow, so that's the main reason we headed to vote. But, this whole thing got me thinking....

What will life be like for The Baby since he will be particularly void of "pop culture" since we don't watch TV??? (And we will certainly be monitoring Internet usage closely.)

Then, I pictured him sitting with his friends who were complaining that their mom shut off the TV because someone had a "wardrobe malfunction" and they were upset because they had been enjoying the show. Then The Baby (who's clearly NOT a baby by then) says, "What's a 'wardrobe malfunction'??" When they explain it, he'll say, "Oh okay, well dad and I were out on this awesome hiking trip last night, and we spotted something way cooler.. a beautiful barn owl."

Thank you to Wikipedia for the pics of RuPaul and Ron Paul.

Food Gone Wild!

On Sunday, our preacher spoke about adultery and its impact on the whole family. Matthew 5:27-30 tells us that it is better to cut your eye out than to commit adultery and that merely lusting after a woman is a sin. Our Preacher mentioned that adultery can be anything that can keep us from connecting and enjoying our spouse the way God intended us to.

Examples that he gave us were not just the traditional focus on pornography but also movies or novels that women use as yardsticks to measure their spouse against. He made a valid point that pornography is "a woman acting in a way that only a man would" and that romance novels are "a man acting as only a woman would". It really got me thinking... about Pinterest of all things.

(Side note: there is a reason this blog is "Random Thoughts with Jaime".)

Pinterest is "interesting". Mostly women post projects and creations they've "upcycled" or "hand-crafted" or "semi-homemade". In general, I think it is nice to have a place to go and look for inspiration on crafts and organizational things. But, I think this site could potentially become adulterous for some.. and not just in the sense that it keeps you away from your spouse and children for HOURS at a time.

I think that some of the ideas can create an idea in kids that life is always supposed to look pretty or your food should always be crafted to look like something else, or that if your house isn't perfectly organized then there is something wrong. Here are some examples:

This fridge is lovely. It's really organized. I like to have an organized fridge too. But, at what point are you wasting valuable time with your kids and witnessing to make your fridge look picture perfect. Then the time to upload and "pin it"?

I appreciate the whole cute factor of making food look like other things. However, I think you can take things WAYYYY too far. This toddler doesn't care that it looks like a bear, I can guarantee. If you've spent any time around a toddler, you can pretty much assume that they might have a melt-down while you are making their food look like something else. Then they have to take it apart and still do something else further to eat it? That sounds like a recipe for disaster. Food SHOULD look good, but eating doesn't always have to be entertainment. Again.. how much are you looking for applause from someone else vs. trying to give your child enjoyment?

(Side note: Those skewers look dangerous with a toddler...)

Perfect house? Are we teaching our kids that in order to be successful, they need a huge custom house with perfectly manicured lawn and perfectly decorated interior with perfectly organized kitchen and fridge (with food sculptures inside)? I think so. This all boils down to materialism. Even if it isn't a huge house, when making things "appear" perfect becomes a way of life (and then taking photos of it for the world to ooh and ahh over), it can become adultery.



Ultimately, I think the overriding message the world is sending to your kids through TV and these sites is: "What you have isn't good enough." In his sermon, Preacher mentioned that he is seeing a growing trend of kids waiting until later and later to get married. They just can't seem to find "the right one". He said that he thinks that is because our media is telling us what real life should be. When he said that, I thought, "An airbrushed, perfectly clothed (even if it is hipster style clothing!!!) woman who has a perfectly organized and clean house and fridge, time for food sculptures and later resembles a porn star in bed when she is done putting the perfectly bathed and dressed children to bed with no fussiness. (All done while updating perfectly taken photos on facebook, pinterest, and twitter.)

What would the husband look like? A man who has rugged handsomeness, washboard abs, and wakes up thinking, "What do you need me to do honey?", who makes you your morning coffee (or Diet Coke in my case) and brings you your perfectly behaved children to your bed and enjoys a little quiet time before heading out to work. On the way to work, he drops off the dry cleaning, deposits extra money in savings accounts for children, and sends you a text to say, "I miss you already." While at work, he makes sure to call you several times and ask what you need before heading home. On his way home, he picks up milk and bread, and of course some flowers for you. When he walks in the door, he says, "Here honey, let me change the baby's diaper and you go rest. He reads bedtime stories after putting away the dishes (of course in the right spot) and never asks for you to bed him if you aren't in the mood. At night, he has pillow talk that your best friend can't compete with and just before drifting off to sleep, he tells you he loves your recent blog that he read on lunch break and you're the best mom and wife ever... every single night.

Now, you may scoff at this and say, "People know that is not what is really going to happen in marriage." But, do they? After you receive the message a million times over on TV, movies, books, pornography, etc, don't you start to believe it? Don't you start thinking that maybe there is something wrong with you if your fridge isn't perfectly organized?

So, now I've renamed Pinterest. New name? SINterest. So, let's be REAL. There was only one man who ever walked this Earth that was perfect. Let's go back to pleasing GOD first, husband next, child next. And let's also put that food sculpturing to rest, unless you get paid for it and that's your way of earning money.

Thank you to Preacher and a Dear Friend who inspired this blog post.

It's Chinese to Me

A funny thing happened the other morning while Husband was getting ready for work. I was nursing The Baby and playing my favorite game on my phone. My Husband comes over to give us a kiss goodbye and asks, "Are you reading CHINESE????!!!"

I almost died laughing. I was playing Mahjong which in no way constitutes any understanding of Chinese. All you have to do is match tiles that have Chinese "characters" on them.

However, before letting him in on that, I decided to go along with it for a minute. "Yes dear, I am practicing because you know how everything is 'Made in China'? Well, one day when they come to collect their debt, we Americans are gonna be in serious trouble if we don't know some Chinese. So, I'm teaching The Baby too. You know he might want to be a foreign interpreter* in case that doesn't happen."

He actually thought for a minute on this and thought I was serious. Perhaps he doesn't know enough about the Chinese language to know how far-fetched it would be for a Stay-At-Home Mom (with a FIVE Month old baby) to have any hopes of learning Chinese in her spare time.

In case you don't either, I'm going to give you the 5 reasons why I'm not learning Chinese anytime soon:

1.) Their language is based on "characters" with absolutely no rhyme or reason. It is rote memorization at its best. English language? 26 characters. Chinese? 20 or so THOUSAND just to even think you might be able to read a news headline.

2.) The language is not even phonetical. The characters don't add up together to make words. They are the words. So, there is nothing to build on. For example, want to say the word "banana" in English? If you know how the letters sound in most cases, you can sound it out. Want to say ''banana" in Chinese? It's pronounced "xiang jiou" which is written like THIS:

3.) It is "HARD" to learn! How hard is it? Let's just say that the average Chinese 3 year old must be a genius if they can say a few words.(Maybe this is why China is taking over the world?) After 10 years of structured classroom learning, an English-speaking native MAY be able to go into a Chinese library and figure out what a book is about after a few minutes. With a Dictionary. In the Kid's section. Now take the same English-speaking person and give them 10 years of say French or Spanish, they can write a doctoral thesis in that language. Not joking you on this: Chinese Junior High School students have a contest sort of like our American spelling bees. Except their contest is to see who can find a word in the dictionary first. Any language that you have no idea how to even start looking up a word seems pretty "hard" to me.

4.) It is a "tonal language". Here in the States, I use my tone to inflect how I'm feeling. If I yell "Husband!," you would have a hard time figuring out what I meant without the tone and contextual clues. It could mean "Husband, I haven't seen you in forever, come and give me sugar!!!" Or it could mean, "Husband, why in the world did you leave your lasagna plate in the bathroom?" In Chinese, tone inflections make the word mean a WHOLE OTHER WORD. And oftentimes we English speakers can't even hear those tonal differences. So, if you have a boss that you're trying to say, "Nice Day" to, it might come off as "Nice dick" given a slightly different tone. (This is just a hypothetical example, but definitely could happen.)

5.) There is no way you can even TYPE in that ca-razy language. Want to type in Chinese? Good luck. I'm not even going to go into all the details of this. But, you can go to Slate's Article that tells you how the Chinese type.

If you look at history, you will see that when countries or empires take over other countries, the invadees have to learn the invader's language. I just don't see that ever happening in America. We are not smart enough to learn this language!

Back to Mahjong for me. Easy, simple, just the way I like it with the recent lack of sleep. If my son wants to interpret* Chinese, he can learn the language on his own time.