You see, The Husband really does have ADD. It hasn't been formally diagnosed, but since I have lived with him for 4 years, I consider myself a reputable source. Hey, I once told The Husband's Father that he had Type 2 Diabetes and he needed to go to the doctor immediately. His blood sugar was at around 600 when he saw the doctor (normal is 80-110). I also told my high school boyfriend that I thought he had appendicitis and needed to go to the emergency room. He had an appendectomy 12 hours later. I've had enough Pre-Med, Emergency classes, and interest in Medicine to know the symptoms of some major illnesses and know when someone needs to see a doctor.
My husband needs to see a doctor about his ADHD. He knows it. I know it. His MOM knows it. My family knows it. Pretty much anyone who has ever spent any time with him KNOWS it.
However, getting him to go is a whole other problem. This weekend he did surgery on his own toe. His toenail was badly ingrown and became infected. I'm not exaggerating when I tell you he spent AT LEAST 10 hours operating on it before he conceded it was something he "may not be able to treat himself". One look at it myself and I knew there was no way I could even help him. It was literally buried between the folds of his toe at the nail line at least a half inch deep. I told him the only way I could fix it for him was to go to UT and get a scalpel from a dissection kit and use some Orajel on it. That's when he decided to go to the doctor. (As you can see, I have my ways of getting him to come to conclusions on his own.)
ADHD or Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder usually manifests its worst symptoms in childhood and adolescents*. Kids have to be at least 4 years old to be diagnosed. Right now about 10% of kids are being diagnosed with ADHD, a figure that has risen in the past 10 years (more about that later).
In order to be diagnosed with ADHD, your child must exhibit at least 6 of the symptoms below for at least 6 months, in MORE than 2 settings. This helps rule out the diagnosis in cases where a child is bored or doesn't like school or where their homelife isn't good which creates bad behaviors. Here are the symptoms:
* Are in Constant Motion
* Squirm and Fidgit
* Do Not Seem to Listen
* Have Difficulty Playing Quietly
* Often Talk Excessively
* Interrupt or intrude on Others
* Are Easily Distracted
* Do Not Finish Tasks
I really was able to solidify "My Diagnosis" of The Husband after I found all of his report cards from Elementary School. His teachers constantly wrote remarks that reflected every one of the symptoms above throughout all of his years. On every one of his standardized tests, he scored extremely poorly (10% or below) on anything that required listening or intense concentration. In other areas he scored mostly above average, showing that he was really intelligent but had listening and concentration issues. When I found these, I immediately understood my husband better and began to try and get him to get treatment for his problem.
After finding these, it has taken a year of "working it" to get The Husband to really believe and understand he even has ADD, much less ADHD. I have seen him struggle so much and my only goals are to make his life easier and help him deal with his ADHD better. Recently, I told him how the ADHD is impacting our family and how I'm afraid it will impact our family as The Baby gets older.
Sixty to seventy percent of kids diagnosed with ADHD as children will continue to have problems with it as adults. I really believe this shows that it is not being over-diagnosed. Here are the ways in which ADHD manifests in adults:
*Chronic Lateness and Forgetfulness
*Anxiety
*Low Self-Esteem
*Employment Problems
*Difficulty Controlling Anger
*Impulsiveness
*Substance Abuse or Addiction
*Poor Organization Skills
*Procrastination
*Low Frustration Tolerance
*Chronic Boredom
*Difficulty Concentrating When Reading
*Mood Swings
*Depression
*Relationship Problems
Adults with ADHD are more likely to have:
*Had a history of poor educational performance or be underachievers
*Had more frequent school disciplinary actions
*Had to repeat a grade
*Dropped out of school more often
*Change employers more often and perform poorly
*Have fewer occupational achievements
*Have a lower socioeconomic status
*Have driving violations and others rate them as having poorer driving habits
*Use illegal substances more frequently (self-medication!)
*Smoke Cigarettes
*Have more marital problems and multiple marriages
*Have higher incidence of separation and divorce
So about 5-6% of adults have this disorder and if it is left untreated, there are obviously very horrible consequences to both the individual and their family. Sadly, this disorder is really on the rise in the South and Midwest (and it is not just that we are getting better at diagnosing unlike in the case of autism). Recent studies suggest two serious reasons why ADHD is on the rise:
1.) Pesticides (makes sense because kids in the South and Midwest are most likely to be near farms)
2.) Early Childhood TV Watching (Due to long winters in Midwest and Socio-economic status, this makes sense too)
The pesticides and TV along with the genetic component are the reasons why we switched our diet to mostly ONLY Organic and why we won't let our child watch TV till he's older. We are trying to do our part to make sure that he has the best chance at not having ADHD.
However, it is too late for The Husband concerning getting ADHD. If you know The Husband very well at all, you would know that he has had problems with every single one of these things listed above except using illegal substances, thank the Lord. He was thankfully able to kick his addiction to chewing tobacco, but still craves it every single day.
After educating myself and others on why he has these issues and how his ADHD manifests, I have so much sympathy for him. He has really done his best to overcome this on his own.
Could you please join me in praying for The Husband and our family in this issue? Also, if you or someone you know has adult ADHD, could you share your stories publicly or privately to encourage him!?
And the rest of you.... the ones who keep saying, "My ADD is kicking in," please stop saying this! The only reason you are distracted and aren't listening is because you're trying to multitask and STUDIES SHOW that multi-tasking is really impossible. All you're doing is quickly switching between tasks and one of the tasks (or both) is going to suffer because of it. So, if you're trying to have a conversation with me, get off of facebook, close your phone, or do whatever else you need to do to have a proper conversation. Or show me your Ritalin script and I'll be sympathetic. ;)
*All facts and statistics listed that are not linked to an outside source are courtesy of www.webmd.com.
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